Freedom Friday: Compassion

Compassion 

Welcome and welcome back. It's another amazing day in paradise 🤩. Thank you so much for being here. 

This is our most recent panhandling sign.

As you probably can tell it folds in half and I can use whichever side we need. We normally use the side that says “All $$ appreciated”.

Lately I’ve been using “Collecting for 2 nights in a hotel”.

It conveniently folds down even further so I can tuck it in my bag to carry it. 

We had saved enough to pay for 3 nights in advance. I was trying to get 5 full days. We're on day 4 and will go out again this morning to see if we can get enough to pay for one more night.

This is how we REALLY homeless!

And it is the most appropriate, yet incredibly vulnerable, way to explain compassion. Compassion by definition courtesy of dictionary.com is “a feeling of deep sympathy and sorrow for another who is stricken by misfortune, accompanied by a strong desire to alleviate the suffering.” 

Panhandling is the way I’ve chosen to use to meet our needs. Please don't get it twisted. Panhandling is HARD! Not everyone can do it. It takes a lot of either shame or faith to do it. For us choosing to do it means Wisdom and I rely on the compassion of others to truly alleviate our suffering. And they have.

For the last 5-6 months we have been standing on the corner of the sidewalk to the entrance of the parking lot on Wake Towne Drive, outside of the Wegmans. There are often two other people panhandling right down the street from us.

We’ve been there in the morning, afternoon, evening and even after our beggars permit says we should stop. Our lives have been affected by hundreds, perhaps thousands of people who extended compassion to us. 

If I had been more data oriented I would have kept track of the demographics. For a while I kept track of names and tried to introduce ourselves. The amount of people who pass and don’t give is WAY higher than the ones who stop. That's cool.

Because what I know is that we've been helped by EVERYONE:

• Our elders
• Children and Youth
• Parents and Grandparents
• Singles, Couples and Families
• Groups of Friends
• ALL colors and
• ALL demographics
• Driving all types of vehicles and
• Walkers.  

Standing on that corner we’ve received:

• Waves,
• Smiles,
• Prayers,
• Beautiful wishes for our future,
• Words of encouragement
• Money,
• Gift cards,
• Hotel stays,
• Food,
• Drinks (especially now that the weather is hot) and, mostly recently,
• Flowers.

They were sunflowers to be exact, which have become my favorite flower for several reasons. Receiving those was literally a dream come true. 

A few of the people recognize us from other places we've been. Some people help more than once. Most are strangers. Because of these individuals, couples and families we have been able to:

• Exist in a state of rest and digest (a regulated nervous system)

• Buy food

• Buy gas

• Stay in a hotel room for multiple nights instead of just one

• Buy a tire for my car

• Travel to my dad’s graveside ceremony in Warsaw, VA in April

• Do our laundry when it’s convenient for me (between 6a & 8a while Wisdom is still sleeping)

• Buy Wisdom cars and other fun and/or educational things

• Purchase other items I’m using to promote what I’m working towards

• Move forward on the projects I’m working on

• Participate in community events

• Create social media posts

• Meet and converse with people who helped us

• Become friends with some of them

While we never know how much we’ll end up with, we do it because:

• God told me to (seriously)
• I know people are compassionate.
• I also know that at some point, we’ll meet most of those people again.

They give us the ability to live life like we’re not living in our car. That’s what keeps my nervous system regulated. Panhandling has given me that freedom. With that freedom, we’ve even been able to help others too (stories for another day). 

Now, I realize some of you might be disgusted and shun me for this. Some of you might applaud me for this. Some of you might be concerned. Personally I’m celebrating myself for sharing this.

This is not the follow up post I intended. One of the reasons I wrote the “I'm Pissed” post is because of all the people who have ghosted me. Perhaps I did the networking thing wrong and talked about myself too much.

I thought that was the point though. But was it? There are so many rules!

In order to validate myself I started writing a post called, “You Should Know Momma Kai”. Not another “do you know me?” but why you should. But yesterday morning God said, “Nope!”. 

Another rule I've been trying to follow is “find your niche”. Sage Lavine of Women Rocking Business says, “When you have a niche you get rich. When you don't have a niche life is a b%@#h”. I've been struggling with that because I ALWAYS have something to talk about and it's all connected. 

But the reason God said “Nope!” is because I was getting clarity on MY specialty, what MY niche is that leads to everything else I want to speak on. That niche is compassion.

As a little backstory, I truly learned about compassion in January 2020 when God invited me to do an intimate study of the Parable of the Exceptional Samaritan in Luke 10. By intimate I mean I used Google and God to dive more deeply into this story. What I didn’t understand outright, I googled. Plus I looked up the definitions of words I thought I knew and gained new insights. 

That parable forms the foundation of who I am as a person because it started out as an answer to the question, “who is my neighbor?” Jesus took it to another level to answer the question and explain how we regard our neighbors. It’s like He expounded on all the other scriptures that matter to me, like:

• Matthew 7:12 otherwise known as The Golden Rule - Therefore all things whatsoever ye would that men should do to you, do ye even so to them: for this is the law and the prophets.

• John 5:13 - Greater love hath no man than this, that a man lay down his life for his friends.

• Matthew 25:35-40 - 

• 35 For I was an hungred, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in:

• 36 Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me.

• 37 Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, and fed thee? or thirsty, and gave thee drink?

• 38 When saw we thee a stranger, and took thee in? or naked, and clothed thee?

• 39 Or when saw we thee sick, or in prison, and came unto thee?

• 40 And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto me.

• Matthew 22:36-40 with attention on verse 39 - 

• 36 Master, which is the great commandment in the law?

• 37 Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind.

• 38 This is the first and great commandment.

• 39 And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself.

• 40 On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets.

(Emphasis added)

Something that still fascinates me about when I studied this is, at the time, Wisdom and I were sleeping in a church. We were participants in Family Promise. Hayes Barton United Methodist Church was hosting us that week. (Please note: F.P. no longer has families sleeping in churches. Thankfully the pandemic and the negative feedback finally caused the program to change.)

If you ask me I’ll tell you, “F.P. was awful!” But I’m forever grateful for that one sacred moment that afforded me an opportunity to have a Bible on hand and some quiet time to connect with a God who continues to prove to me how much I am seen, Loved, known and appreciated. 

This is only the beginning of the conversation on compassion. I have so much more to say. It’s my niche! I’ll pause for now though. Thank you again for being here. 

To be continued… (You should still enjoy the amazing day you’re creating!)

#ThisIsHowWeHomeless

#DoYouKnowMommaKai

#ItsTimeToLUV

#EmancipatedMomma 

#LUVEnterprisesPresents

P.S.: If you'd like to help me or Wisdom either personally or with the business/nonprofit I'm working to launch, please check out this digital business card for ways to send funds or donate to the fundraiser a friend launched for me.